A big thank you to all of the participants and fans. It was a great tournament and I hope we see you again next year. Now get back to work. Please.
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Final Note
A big thank you to all of the participants and fans. It was a great tournament and I hope we see you again next year. Now get back to work. Please.
Eye Spy: Celebrity Carnivore, John K!
He couldn't stay, but he made sure to stop by and give his support. Huge thank you to Super-Fan John K.Centre Court Sightings To Date: 4
Today's Championship Action: Day 15 Results!
The Finals!
Game 1:
Agent J (Jean/Jeremie) vs. Beaver Patrol (Dovi/Jonny Tal-Jonny Tal)
What can you say about Championship Day? Not much, really, so I'm out of here.
Oh, I'm just kidding. There's plenty to say!
The crowd poured in through the Centre Court gate, money in hand, ready to gamble. I haven't seen that many singles passed around since Tim, Tom, Page, and I went to Treasures in Las Vegas, where I met my future second wife Iman. Oops! Was I not supposed to use real names? Oh, well. Will, Kane, Steve G, Jess, and others scrambled to get their bets in order. Will was asking for 5-1 odds...and getting them! Fans frantically shouted for betting partners. Ryan had the look of someone who just bet the mortgage without getting wifely permission first, but he couldn't stop wagering. The mood was infectious! It was like the floor of the NY Stock Exchange the day Duran Duran rang the opening bell. And then Page walked in. Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared, as if he was a two ton gorilla wearing assless chaps. Holy crow. This was it. This was the big time. For those of you not in the know, Page doesn't show up unless he knows that the action will be hot and there's significant money to be made. The shock of recognition swirled through the crowd. Even Will's jaw dropped, if only a touch. Game on. Handshakes, staredowns, and finger-points were exchanged as the pre-game activity escalated to a fever pitch. J Brown cranked out megaphone after megaphone, thus ensuring sound levels not unlike those on the Space Shuttle launch pad. The shout went up: "Rally!!" It was time.
The participants looked a little shaky at first and it was no surprise, given the earsplitting volume of the fans. Dovi flubbed service. Jonny served into the net 17 times and took a pill shot. Jeremie hit shots long. Jean looked pretty sharp, though, and the crowd buzzed about a possible Game 2. Wouldn't that be sick? Yeah, tell me about it. Kane turned to me and muttered something biblical about Armageddon and The Rapture as he stuffed a wad of dollar bills down his mouth in an effort to clog his throat and keep his lunch down, but I couldn't really hear him and I had my own problems at that point. Jess looked like he needed medical attention again as his cranial scar was vibrating open. He looked like Sissy Spacek in Carrie as gore streamed down from the top of his head. Some of the new fans went white as the blood rushed to their overworked brains. The intensity was at a dangerous level and it seemed like anything could happen at that point. The scores stayed super-tight, but Agent J seemed to be playing a little better. Beaver Patrol looked nervous for the first time all tournament. Jiminy Christ!
11-serving-11. Well, here we were again. Tight scores halfway through. Would they remain close? Would we have a possible deuce? Or would one team fall off the map like so many times before? Unfortunately, it was the latter. Beaver Patrol screwed its courage back on and started playing consistently, plinking themselves to an 18-12 lead as Agent J blew point after point (Thanks to Mike B for the word "plink." I wish I had it ten days ago.). This was not the finish we wanted. Agent J, perhaps seeing the tourney slip through their fingers, mounted a comeback. One point. Two points. Could it be? Were we headed to deuce for the first time all tournament?....
Beaver Patrol over Agent J
21-17
Beaver Patrol are your 2005 Tippett Studio Pong Tournament Winners!
Congratulations to Dovi and Jonny T. Photos to follow shortly.
Game 1:
Agent J (Jean/Jeremie) vs. Beaver Patrol (Dovi/Jonny Tal-Jonny Tal)
What can you say about Championship Day? Not much, really, so I'm out of here.
Oh, I'm just kidding. There's plenty to say!
The crowd poured in through the Centre Court gate, money in hand, ready to gamble. I haven't seen that many singles passed around since Tim, Tom, Page, and I went to Treasures in Las Vegas, where I met my future second wife Iman. Oops! Was I not supposed to use real names? Oh, well. Will, Kane, Steve G, Jess, and others scrambled to get their bets in order. Will was asking for 5-1 odds...and getting them! Fans frantically shouted for betting partners. Ryan had the look of someone who just bet the mortgage without getting wifely permission first, but he couldn't stop wagering. The mood was infectious! It was like the floor of the NY Stock Exchange the day Duran Duran rang the opening bell. And then Page walked in. Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared, as if he was a two ton gorilla wearing assless chaps. Holy crow. This was it. This was the big time. For those of you not in the know, Page doesn't show up unless he knows that the action will be hot and there's significant money to be made. The shock of recognition swirled through the crowd. Even Will's jaw dropped, if only a touch. Game on. Handshakes, staredowns, and finger-points were exchanged as the pre-game activity escalated to a fever pitch. J Brown cranked out megaphone after megaphone, thus ensuring sound levels not unlike those on the Space Shuttle launch pad. The shout went up: "Rally!!" It was time.
The participants looked a little shaky at first and it was no surprise, given the earsplitting volume of the fans. Dovi flubbed service. Jonny served into the net 17 times and took a pill shot. Jeremie hit shots long. Jean looked pretty sharp, though, and the crowd buzzed about a possible Game 2. Wouldn't that be sick? Yeah, tell me about it. Kane turned to me and muttered something biblical about Armageddon and The Rapture as he stuffed a wad of dollar bills down his mouth in an effort to clog his throat and keep his lunch down, but I couldn't really hear him and I had my own problems at that point. Jess looked like he needed medical attention again as his cranial scar was vibrating open. He looked like Sissy Spacek in Carrie as gore streamed down from the top of his head. Some of the new fans went white as the blood rushed to their overworked brains. The intensity was at a dangerous level and it seemed like anything could happen at that point. The scores stayed super-tight, but Agent J seemed to be playing a little better. Beaver Patrol looked nervous for the first time all tournament. Jiminy Christ!
11-serving-11. Well, here we were again. Tight scores halfway through. Would they remain close? Would we have a possible deuce? Or would one team fall off the map like so many times before? Unfortunately, it was the latter. Beaver Patrol screwed its courage back on and started playing consistently, plinking themselves to an 18-12 lead as Agent J blew point after point (Thanks to Mike B for the word "plink." I wish I had it ten days ago.). This was not the finish we wanted. Agent J, perhaps seeing the tourney slip through their fingers, mounted a comeback. One point. Two points. Could it be? Were we headed to deuce for the first time all tournament?....
Beaver Patrol over Agent J
21-17
Beaver Patrol are your 2005 Tippett Studio Pong Tournament Winners!
Congratulations to Dovi and Jonny T. Photos to follow shortly.
Pills Or Not?
Jonny Tal took the only pill shot in the game, although he says it was closer to Larry Hagman than it was to the actual pills (see diagram for Jonny's alleged impact area). He also claims that he intentionally dodged the ball so he wouldn't get pilled. You be the judge.
Expert Predictions
The players sound off.
Q: Who do you think will win in today's Championship Round?
Voss: Beaver Patrol
JParm 5000: Beaver Patrol
Dan C: Beaver Patrol
Mike B: Beaver Patrol
Steve G: Agent J
Chuck: Agent J
Q: Who do you think will win in today's Championship Round?
Voss: Beaver Patrol
JParm 5000: Beaver Patrol
Dan C: Beaver Patrol
Mike B: Beaver Patrol
Steve G: Agent J
Chuck: Agent J
Prostitute Profile: Anonymous!
"I think I'm 'bouts to go to jail. There's an officer walking right towards me."- An unnamed working girl on San Pablo talking into her cell phone today. No word on whether there is a pong table in the lock-up of if she could even play in the incredibly high heels she was wearing.
Michael Clemens: "Tournament is Snoozeville!"
Are you just going to sit there and take that? Good grief, those are fighting words. Or a visual smackdown. Or something.
News Flash: This Just In!
I've just been informed by Jonny Tal that Jonny Tal is not nervous and that Jonny Tal was not admitting yesterday that Jonny Tal is expecting to choke in Game 1 today. On the contrary, Jonny Tal says that Jonny Tal is expecting to win Game 1 today.We now return to regular programming.
Hot Storylines!
- Who will win their second championship, Jean or Dovi?
- Jean and Dovi played together for their previous championship wins. Is there any animosity now that they are opponents? Is the student now the master?
- Which rookie will win their first Championship? Do they have what it takes to withstand the pressure? Who will crack first?
- Will Beaver Patrol's steady style match up well against Agent J's offensive force? Does Beaver Patrol have enough offense to win in the playoffs?
- Did Beaver Patrol cruise to the Championship on a soft schedule? Was their layoff too long? Are they rusty?
- Agent J has played a lot of high pressure games. Will they be worn out or battle tested?
- Is today the day that Will's "good-natured" taunting gets out of hand? Will it come to blows?
I'm freaking out, because I have no answers!!
- Jean and Dovi played together for their previous championship wins. Is there any animosity now that they are opponents? Is the student now the master?
- Which rookie will win their first Championship? Do they have what it takes to withstand the pressure? Who will crack first?
- Will Beaver Patrol's steady style match up well against Agent J's offensive force? Does Beaver Patrol have enough offense to win in the playoffs?
- Did Beaver Patrol cruise to the Championship on a soft schedule? Was their layoff too long? Are they rusty?
- Agent J has played a lot of high pressure games. Will they be worn out or battle tested?
- Is today the day that Will's "good-natured" taunting gets out of hand? Will it come to blows?
I'm freaking out, because I have no answers!!
Will Watch: Who's He Betting On?
We won't know until game time, but inquiring minds are desperate to know.
Megaphones
The Tippett Studio Pong Tournament 2005 has contracted with a major manufacturer to supply fans with Officially Licensed Personal Palm-Sized Unpowered Megaphones for today's Championship Round. Please visit the Hospitality Booth to pick yours up when you arrive.
The Biggest Betting Day Of The Year!
Hello, Pong Fans!
Today is Championship Wednesday. An unofficial American holiday. Thousands of man-hours of work will be lost today as people around the globe will be crowding the internet for information, scores, and highlights. It's also the biggest gambling day of the year. Bigger than the Super Bowl and Extreme Chess combined. More money will change hands at Centre Court than on a normal Monday at a Swiss bank. For the uninitiated who want to get involved, here's what you do:
1. Get some money.
2. Bring it to Centre Court.
It's that easy! Someone is bound to be yelling at the top of their lungs, looking for someone to bet with. If you like the action, wave your money in their direction and consummate the bet. It's like rolling out of bed and shuffling to the john for the first pee of the day. You barely have to use your brain.
Possible betting points:
1. Overall winner
2. One game or two
3. Overall winner in game one or two
4. Progressive pill count
5. First pill hit
6. Rally winner
7. Skunking
I'm sure there will be more available at game time, but that should get you started. Remember: bet with your head, not over it. Also remember: There's no "I" in "team," but there is one in "Guido," "Jim Brown," and "Jeremie."
4:40 at Centre Court
Today is Championship Wednesday. An unofficial American holiday. Thousands of man-hours of work will be lost today as people around the globe will be crowding the internet for information, scores, and highlights. It's also the biggest gambling day of the year. Bigger than the Super Bowl and Extreme Chess combined. More money will change hands at Centre Court than on a normal Monday at a Swiss bank. For the uninitiated who want to get involved, here's what you do:
1. Get some money.
2. Bring it to Centre Court.
It's that easy! Someone is bound to be yelling at the top of their lungs, looking for someone to bet with. If you like the action, wave your money in their direction and consummate the bet. It's like rolling out of bed and shuffling to the john for the first pee of the day. You barely have to use your brain.
Possible betting points:
1. Overall winner
2. One game or two
3. Overall winner in game one or two
4. Progressive pill count
5. First pill hit
6. Rally winner
7. Skunking
I'm sure there will be more available at game time, but that should get you started. Remember: bet with your head, not over it. Also remember: There's no "I" in "team," but there is one in "Guido," "Jim Brown," and "Jeremie."
4:40 at Centre Court
Things Jonny Tal Wants You To Know
Jonny Tal stopped by my desk yesterday after break to let me know that I needed to inform the masses of a few things about the Championship Round:
1. His team only has to win once to be champions.
2. If his team loses, they still get one more chance to win.
Sounds like Jonny's hedging his bets, but it's really not for me to decide.
Anyway, here's how it goes. Beaver Patrol, as winners of the Winner's Bracket, still have a loss to give. If they win the first game, Agent J, the winner of the Loser's Bracket, are eliminated as it's their second loss of the tournament. In this scenario, there will be no second game. If Agent J wins the first game, both teams will have lost one game in the tournament and then have a one-game playoff to determine the tournament champs. Let's break it down further:
Scenario A: Beaver Patrol wins Game 1. Tournament over. Beaver Patrol are the champions.
Scenario B: Agent J wins Game 1. Game 2 is played. The winners of Game 2 are the champions.
Note: Both games will be played today! Holy smokes!
See you out there. 4:40.
1. His team only has to win once to be champions.
2. If his team loses, they still get one more chance to win.
Sounds like Jonny's hedging his bets, but it's really not for me to decide.
Anyway, here's how it goes. Beaver Patrol, as winners of the Winner's Bracket, still have a loss to give. If they win the first game, Agent J, the winner of the Loser's Bracket, are eliminated as it's their second loss of the tournament. In this scenario, there will be no second game. If Agent J wins the first game, both teams will have lost one game in the tournament and then have a one-game playoff to determine the tournament champs. Let's break it down further:
Scenario A: Beaver Patrol wins Game 1. Tournament over. Beaver Patrol are the champions.
Scenario B: Agent J wins Game 1. Game 2 is played. The winners of Game 2 are the champions.
Note: Both games will be played today! Holy smokes!
See you out there. 4:40.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)